I'm just gonna blog now for myself, it's not like anyone reads or cares about what I type in my blog anyway...haha what am i saying? no one really cares about me virtually or in real life for that matter, just my bestfriend and my family who i love very much. Life is being so hard to work out right now, it is just so confusing. I'm kind of back to the old me, who used to think about suicide alot...yea it's not healthy, i don't do it for attention either, it's just that i don't wanna live sometimes. If i died, no one would care, let alone no one would even know if i dissapear. I feel like I'm nothing, no good for anything. I'm just plain shit ugly,fat,no brains,nothing. You know those kind of boys who tell you " i love you so much xxxxx" and shit? yea i don't listen to them,never do, cause it's really stupid. i mean, i barely know you, and you say that? okay and what i saw today on omegle was just pure cruelty. I saw a dog fucking a woman, at first i was like, awww a dog, cause the screen wasn't loadd properly, then i saw the other half of the screen where this woman was just there being fucked by a dog. I was just soo disgusted by it. I am never going on Omegle again. Those horny people on Omegle... i hate them. So you just chat with this really nice cute guy for like an hour, then he suddenly just tells you to flash.. what a waste of my fucking time really. this happened to my a couple of times. Some guys really don't respect girls...like those Hip-hop or whatever music videos, where them girls are just shaking their booties and like being touched by all those horny men... that's just sad. I really love Tumblr really, pictures reblogged on Tumblr are just beautiful, those cute couples taking a photo. Enough about that. I really don't want school to start again...i know i'm gonna be this loner hanging around by herself,my bestfriend's gone now... what am i to do? i can't go back to my old friends and be like " YO WHATS UP, NOW THAT ___'S NOT IN THIS SCHOOL ANYMORE,I SHALL HANG OUT WITH YOU GUYS" not cool. It just not fair for anyone. so the simplest solution is to just hang out by myself.lol.. hang out? no, just sit in the classroom by myself... all those people i used to hang out with, are like gone, i mean, i don't even talk to them anymore, it's really sad, really. I keep crying lately, okay since a long time ago, and i just feel like shit, i feel that everything's shit...i don't want to go back to school, all the work's that's given to us, we're just kids.. come on, let us have like, a little bit of freedom. i' just so sad./ i don't even know why, i just start crying, and then start to think about the reasons why I'm crying for, and then the thought of that makes me wanna cry even harder...