I Don't Even Know

I haven't blogged in a while so I would like to write down my thoughts today.

Oh and today's my sister's birthday.
Happy Birthday Arisa!


My first post in 2013!
This year started off great, ( January). I really like my class, they're really quiet in a good way. I really like my teachers this year too!
German class is my favorite, I've been learning so much. My second favorite class would be History, then, probably Chemistry.

Well so.. around I don't know, February? Everything just became shit again.
I felt like , I don't know... going back to my Year 2-3 days. I felt so horrible. I heard things from people like " Oh she's fat" " She's so ugly" " She thinks she's hot shit", you know, those kind of words. Words that really really really hurt. So I know that I'm not exactly slim , yes I AM pretty ugly, but I just don't understand why people have to discuss about this. My friend has also been called " pork" and things on Twitter and I really don't understand what goes through people's minds when they write out these kind of things on Twitter. Was it really necessary? I don't think they understand that people actually commit suicide after these kind of comments are written. They'll probably start giving a fuck after the person's dead, which is really sad. Oh and the funniest part is , she's not even fat! AT ALL. OH, and I can also say a lot of horrible things about these people who said stuff about us , but no, we choose and chose not to cause we don't want to be the " bully" bullying the bully... haha.
Well, okay, we tried not giving a fuck about what these people say, but obviously we could not forget those MEANNNN UNKINDDD words, so we've been going on this whole exercise, eating-healthy routine, and it's going really well so far! I can see results (:
Seriously though, just cause we don't cry in school,  doesn't mean we're hurt. Well, I cried in school 3 times this year... I know I'm weak.

I really thought I liked this cohort but hahaha I change my mind. This cohort's horrible... When are they going to grow up? Start acting their age? I don't even know. I kinda feel bad for them. They really have nothing better to talk about.

Well, so this year I'm going to ... I didn't even do or say anything in the first place... I don't understand why I'm getting all this unnecessary attention from people. I'm just going to get by this year, hopefully.
Everything died down, as of now... I have a feeling this whole thing would start again.

I can't even seem to post a picture of my face without hesitating or photoshopping my face... to make myself look better...

I just can't help it.. I choose not to give a fuck, but I really can't help it. I can't ignore hurtful words, I'm sure most people can't either. Well, I can ignore it, but it will stay in my mind forever, you know. I'll still know that people have called me ugly, fat, and stuff, I know they're simple words that shouldn't be affecting me at all, but god damn, those words hurt.